Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Core Assumptions
Every life science has a set of core assumptions it operates out of. The core assumptions of CBT are based on the assumption that the quality of our thoughts impact how we relate to our life’s experiences. This means that the attitude and approach we take towards life, relationships and people will influence the outcomes we experience throughout life.
9. OUR INTERNAL WORLD MANIFESTS ITSELF IN OUR OUTSIDE WORLD
Thought power is the key to creating our reality. Everything we perceive in the physical world has its origins in the invisible, inner world of our thoughts and beliefs. To become the master of your own destiny, we must first learn to control the nature of our habitual negative thinking patterns. In doing this, we begin to attract into our lives more of the things we actually want as we come to recognize this truth: our thoughts create our reality.
For every ‘outside effect’ there is an ‘inner cause’: every effect we see in our outside world has a specific cause which originated in our inner or mental world. This is the very nature of thought power. In other words, the circumstances and conditions of our lives are a result of our collective thoughts and beliefs. Every aspect of our lives, from the state of our health to the state of our finances and our relationships, reveals our thoughts and beliefs.
It’s an ‘inside job’: most people get it back to front and believe that they think or feel a certain way as a result of their external circumstances. They do not know the truth that it is their thoughts which are creating these very circumstances (whether desired or not). By internalizing and applying the truth that our thoughts create our reality, we can go on to create the changes that we want to see and begin working towards achieving our life goals. Reality is an inside job.
Q. If you were to accept that this assumption was true, how might your attitude towards life and other people change?
10. HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE
Do you know any difficult people in your life? Individuals who are easily offended by words? You have to watch everything you say around them through fear that you’ll set off a trigger in them that leads them to lash out in anger. Or perhaps this person is you. Do other people walk on eggshells around you? Do they avoid you? Do they hold back for fear of how you will react?
If you don’t deal with your own hurts, you end up hurting others. When you don’t forgive other people, you hurt. When you don’t forgive yourself, you hurt. This is true on a physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual level.
Here are ten indicators of hurt people who hurt others:
- They are easily threatened so are quick to attack with their words.
- They misjudge others and often assume other people are against them.
- They don’t see or understand the pain they inflict on other people.
- They don’t understand why others don’t understand them.
- They won’t let down their guard, so they are always on the defensive.
- They don’t take responsibility for their behavior.
- They are easily offended.
- They are quick to react in anger.
- If they feel backed into a corner regarding an issue, they’ll come out fighting.
- They rarely have close, intimate friendships.
It’s very difficult to help a hurting person unless they want your help. If you are the one that is hurting, recognize that your pain is causing other people pain and get help for yourself and the people around you. It really does matter.
Here are some common traits hurt people display when they’re interacting with other people.
- Hurt people usually transfer their inner anger onto their family and close friends. Often, the people around them become the recipients of fits of rage and harsh tones because they have unknowingly become the recipients of ‘transferred rage’.
- Hurt people interpret every word that is spoken to them through the prism of their pain. This means that words are often misinterpreted to mean something negative towards them. As a result, they are extremely sensitive and respond out of pain, as supposed to reality.
- Hurt people tend to interpret every action through the prism of their pain. They often jump to incorrect conclusions about other people’s motives or evil intent behind their actions towards them.
- Hurt people often have a ‘victim mentality’ where they believe that they are ‘victim’ to the circumstances and situations life throws their way.
- Hurt people often find it very difficult entering into a trusting relationship. • Hurt people often carry around a suspicious spirit.
- Hurt people often alienate other people and wonder why there is no one there for them. They are often so focused on their own hurt that they disregard and disrespect others without even realizing it. They continually hurt the people they love and need the most as a result of their self destructive behaviors.
- Hurt people are often depressed or frustrated because they allow past pain to continually spill over into their present. Much of the time they are not even aware of why they are always depressed or frustrated because they have coped with the pain by compartmentalizing it.
Q. If you were to accept that this assumption was true, how might your attitude towards life and other people change?
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